I want it NOW! Instant gratification and how to screw up your life forever

Flashback 5 years…There I was laying on the path staring up at the sky. Just  a moment before I was running. Now it felt like someone had ripped my foot off and stapled it back on. It had happened before. My right ankle would twist and there I would be staring up at the sky. Kim would joke that I have fallen down in some of the most amazing cities around the world..New York, London, Paris, LA, Rome, Honolulu and a few more.   We would be walking along and suddenly there I was examining sidewalks around the world.

I have not been kind to my body over the years. I worked construction for 15 years on and off. In between those times I would sell real estate, become a stock broker, manage restaurants and finally self help guru, who also intimately knew the sidewalks of the world.  I have pulled ripped and abused just about every joint in my body while working construction. Most of the time it was minor  but sometimes I would yank my back out and be down for weeks.  I am no stranger to being physical or the pain of injury.

I fully expected this to be the same. Finally I began to get up. I decided to continue at a jog so I could finish my run before the swelling started. I had done that many times before. I knew the drill….I thought.

I like to push the edge of what I can get away with. I think that is why I got so good at the self help and persuasion skills we teach. I always want to know where the edge is and then push a little more. So after a few weeks I started running again and doing all the things that I thought I should be able to do.  The problem was that this time my ankle was not healing. Years of falling down had done something different. The pain was not going away this time.

I am like a lot of people. I want everything right now. I want to heal now. I want to feel better now. I want my problems solved now. I want my food now. Everyone wants it now. I meet people every day that want to lose weight NOW. Stop smoking NOW. Get a date NOW. If they don’t get it NOW they move to the next fad or quick fix. Everything has to be faster in order to be better. People will spend 15K to walk on hot coals to have instant transformation.

The problem is that sometime you can’t have it now. Life is not a pizza delivery. 2 years ago things got pretty bad. I could barely walk across a room without extreme pain. Some days were better than others but even shopping for groceries was a very painful experience.  Ever time I pushed myself harder I would cause more damage and more pain. I had to learn patience. The worst part for me was that I could not do the things Kim likes to do. Physically I could not do them.

I had to make some choices. What I was doing was not working. I began by changing what I ate and got on some supplements…well they kind of filled my hand every morning so some does not cover it. Then I learned to sit on my butt. I hate that. I had to learn to do what I could and when to stop. It was a frustrating time. I went though several foot braces before I found one that worked. I started doing things that were active but not too active. Over time the pain began to disappear BUT…every once in a while I would move just the wrong way and down I would go writhing in pain.

Your mind does weird things in these circumstances. It begins to find reasons for what is happening. Maybe I was just getting old. Maybe I would have to live with the pain. Maybe I can’t expect to get better. Maybe I will never run again. It can be quite depr3essing if you get lost in those thoughts……but I was patient and there were more and more days that were better.

Then  a miracle happened!

To you this will not seem like much. Yesterday I was at the movies. I went to see the Lincoln Lawyer. Pretty good BTW. I was joking around with Kim and ended up chasing her down the aisle and out of the theater into the lobby…….running without any pain at all. Was it a miracle? Not really. It was the result of doing little things right over a period of time. I was speechless. Those of you who know me will understand how rarely that happens.

I realize that many if you want it now. We live in an immediate gratification world. When it comes to making changes in your life some will be dramatic. Some will be small. You might not even realize that you have made them until one day you suddenly can do something you have never done before…or in a while. The key is to keep moving. It will not be instantaneous. A few years ago I helped a guy get rid of his life long elevator phobia in 7 minutes. It was instant. After that I helped a guy who had never approached a women in 37 years. That took 10 minutes. That was fast. Did those things make their lives perfect? NO. It had an impact. If they kept making changes after that they might have great lives now. If they stopped they had one part that is better.

Change is a process not a miracle. It does take dedication. It does take self examination. It does take work. If you are willing to do those things your life can be what you want it to be.

For me, today my ankle is a little sore but WAY better than 6 months ago. 3 months ago I could still not walk down stairs without holding onto something. This morning no problem just a little pain. Amazing progress. Now I can get back in shape and do even more WHILE…knowing when to rest and knowing how to measure progress and success.

If you haven’t started changing your life yet then today is the time to get going. If you are already started notice your progress even if you are not finished. There will be bumps in the road. That is OK. The end result is worth it.

Yeah I know the temptation for instant answers and instant fixes and instant gratification is tempting. The truth is that it can screw your life up forever if that is how you expect things to work out.

Have fun

Tom